How men and women communicate
You be the judge
Rebecca: You were home with the girls today, what did you do?
Seth: I took the girls to Build A Bear. Ella built a smurf. We walked around the mall for a little bit and ate Mrs. Fields cookies. We came home.
4 sentences. Less than 30 seconds.
Now let’s see Rebecca’s take – doing exactly the same thing (literally, just a different day)
Rebecca:
Having three kids means that it can be difficult to spend quality time with each child. Max loves to go to the movies with me so we have had several Mommy, Max movie dates. Ella was complaining and she wanted an Ella, Mommy Build A Bear date. My girlfriend was taking her daughter to a My Little Pony Party at Build A Bear, which I thought would be perfect for Ella. Ella loves My Little Pony and she was even going to get to make a stuffed My Little Pony at the party. Ella was so excited and she was debating which pony she would get to make.
We show up at the party and Ella is jumping up and down and can’t wait to go in and choose a pony. The ponies are both so pretty and I am so excited for my baby. It is so interesting as an adult how much fun I still have seeing my daughter do things that I know I would have loved as a child. I take Max to the toy store and I find myself drifting down the girl aisles wanting to pick out stuff for Ella. Ella has a dollhouse, a kitchen, a barbie dollhouse, a Barbie Car, over 40 Barbies…..Ella has gotten almost everything I wanted as a child. It is so fun for me! My husband isn’t so amused by this!
I can’t wait to see which beautiful pony Ella chooses. We walk into Build A Bear and Ella starts looking at all of her options. “Why are you looking around?” I ask my daughter very confused. “I have to see what all the choices are,” Ella is now telling me as she looks at every single stuffed option there is. “I thought you were making a pony for the My Little Pony party,” I ask Ella puzzled by her now lack of interest in making a pony. “Smurfette!” Ella declares. “You want to make Smurfette?” I am beyond confused because she didn’t even like the Smurf movie. Now when we came here last year I wanted her to make Smurfette because I loved Smurfette as a child and Ella refused and ended up making Hello Kitty. Now that we are at a My Little Pony party now she chooses Smurfette. I just can’t keep up with my child. I should be celebrating that she has a mind of her own. However, I am concerned with the aftermath.
“Ella, you were dying to make a pony, will you please choose a pony. Mommy doesn’t want you to get upset later that you didn’t make a pony,” I am trying to cover my bases and avoid a tantrum later. “Mommy, I want to make Smurfette. I am not changing my mind. I am not making a pony. I promise I won’t get upset later. I just love Smurfette!” Ella is pleading her case begging me to let her choose Smurfette. “This is a My Little Pony party. Are you absolutely 100% positive that you want to make Smurfette and that you are still going to be happy with your choice when we leave?” I know my daughter. I know that in a couple of hours she is going to want a Pony. “No, no, no! I am making Smurfette. I don’t want a pony. Just let me make Smurfette!” Ella is adamant at this point. The ladies who work at Build A Bear are watching this whole scene laughing at the situation. They appear to completely understand what I am going through. My friend is also laughing at my daughter choosing Smurfette. You see, her daugther picked Twilight, and an outfit for Twilight, and even some hair extensions for Twilight the pony. I look around
the room. Every single girl is standing there with their new pony. There was a little boy who chose to make an animal. I just have to laugh!
So, I let Ella pick Smurfette against my better judgement. She chooses a dress for Smurfette and she is thrilled. I would say it is now two months after this whole event and Ella is still in love with Smurfette. Ella plays with Smurfette all the time and carries her all over the place. Her father has also taken her back to Build A Bear to get another Smurf. I guess I was wrong. There has not only been no pony meltdown there has also been no request to go get a pony. Go figure! I am very happy to be wrong!
Here’s the funnier part. She knows it!
When I get home, if she has enough energy left over that our little vampires (children) didn’t suck out of her, and if the headache they have given her isn’t too bad – she will ask how my day was. I will say fine. If she’s really in a good mood she might ask for a few more details, and get a few sentences out of me.
Here is her knowing about how she communicates:
When I get home she says, “Let me tell you about my day.”
I will urge her to just give me the end result.
She will say, “I will but let me tell you what happened first.”
“I don’t need the whole story.”
“I know and I will try and be quick.”
End result – she went to Reed’s Jewlers to buy some Alex & Ani bracelets – her new obsession. She bought two for herself and gave two to her friend.
Two sentences.
It took her about 5 minutes to tell me the “quick version” of that story.
My wife will go out to dinner with her friends, and will have been there for two hours, and I will text her and she will tell me that they haven’t even ordered yet!
Rebecca’s response:
-Ok, ok, so in my defense Seth…I told you about all of my errands and ALL the money I spent! I also told you all the people I bumped into! I know you love me! You didn’t want to marry a man! Women give details! This is why women love talking to women! I love you honey 😉
